ecoutez-vous, look book

One of the things I love about New York magazine is its Look Book feature, in which dipshits opine about their sartorial choices. This week’s sucker is a French woman, which automatically endears me to her simply because of her nationality. But then I read what she, a “fashion consultant,” had to say:
French women always have a little something that makes it. They have a touch. The Americans have less the touch; they follow too much what they learn in magazines.

Look, I love the French-girl style, I really do, but implying that Americans are the only ones who slavishly follow magazines is a bunch of merde. Anyone who’s spent time in Paris knows that women there devour Elle weekly. Yes, French women are generally more stylish than Americans, but come on. It’s stupid to pretend that they don’t follow magazine tips. What gaul.I  also wasn’t going to be rude, but what the hell: This woman’s a fashion consultant?! Nothing’s really wrong with her outfit per se, but that’s the problem. It’s the epitome of refinement, safety and good taste, and it is therefore boring. I’m not a fan of wacky fashion, and I don’t think you have to go avant-garde to look interesting, but this is just a snooze. Bland color palette, frumpy shoes, and a coat that looks like something Sinbad (the “comedian,” not the sailor) would wear. Topped off with a smug smile and a “Can you believe I look zis good?” ta-da pose, it represents the worst of French style.

sarah jessica parker’s bitten: pictures ahoy

Fashionista has the first pictures of Sarah Jessica Parker’s line (Bitten! how goth!) for Steve and Barry’s, which brings back collegiate memories of frat rats buying their three-for-$10 university sweatshop t-shirts. I’d like to say that I’d hoped that Bitten would be a great cheap-chic line, but really, I didn’t. A store known for selling athletic apparel isn’t exactly the best fit for fashion.

The line will be a good seller, I’m sure, because you’ll get university students and suburban types who will coo over Parker’s association with the brand. But it’s a blow to Parker’s branding. Sure, it’s great that she’s trying to make fashion inexpensive and accessible—you could argue that it means more when she does it than when, say, Proenza Schouler do it, because Parker is known for being stylish (as opposed to being a fashion house that’s written about in run-on sentences like this one here). But there’s no cachet to Steve and Barry’s, no cachet to the drab, seen-it-before shirts and CAMO PANTS in the line. It just looks like Old Navy’s clearance rack.

Old Navy would have been a better fit for Parker, actually. She fits their demographic well; she appeals to moms who want good value, and teenagers who want to look trendy on the cheap. It would have been a much better fit, and with many Old Navy locations blighting New York City, the photo ops would have been so much better. Imagine Bitten launching in Soho. Yeah, anyone who knows New York and its scene would roll her eyes, but if you weren’t keyed into that scene, you’d be all, “Wow, launching in Soho! High fashion!”

sales roundup!

Maybe you have a tax refund coming? I do, but it’s going to my exciting Condo Buying Fund. Shop for me, dear reader, for I cannot shop myself.

If a $315 handbag is a bargain to you, head to Botkier to pick up its Bombay satchel for that price—it’s half the regular price.

Shopjake has 3.1 Phillip Lim resort at more than half-off, plus more from Mayle and Josh Goot.

Bird LA has Repetto flats and boots on the cheapish. Okay, the less-expensivish.

I would find some sale items at Le Train Bleu but their site redesign took all of the aggravatingly poor aspects of the old site and used that as inspiration. Seriously, what gives?

jovovich-hawk for mng/mango pictures

The main Jovovich-Hawk line is cute and cool in a vintage way, but the prices are unjustifiably high; I have two pieces and while they’re nice, they aren’t that nice. For $449, you should get more than a camisole—or at least you should get a camisole with Karl Lagerfeld’s sweat on it, you know?

So I am happy that Jovovich-Hawk’s cheapy collection will be at Mango in April. Obviously the quality won’t be as high as the main line, but really, the stuff is cute enough to sucker me into the snore zone of Mango. Here are teeny-tiny pics of the collection; I really want the last two pieces. What do you think?

things you should never wear: stacked heels

Do not listen to what any fashion magazine tells you about this, unless you are reading the magazine for which I work, because we will tell you the truth: Stacked heels, particularly when shown in platform, uh, form, look cheap.

I know, you’re thinking, “No, they don’t look cheap. They look Chloe-esque!” You are mistaken.

Here, take a look at these two shoes.

Can you tell which one is cheapy Target and which one costs $350? Probably. But would you feel clever spending $350 on either shoe? I should hope not. Though one has actual stacked wood and the other is merely printed-on pleather, the difference isn’t that noticeable. And when something expensive doesn’t give off the appearance of quality, you are a sucker for buying it. And on top of that, you wind up looking like you just stepped out of Family Dollar.

cathy horyn, pauper?

Boo f’ing hoo, Cathy Horyn!

This weekend’s NYT magazine has a sob story from Cathy Horyn about how she can’t afford expensive designer clothing, and–can you believe the embarrassment?–she had to buy an Alice and Olivia tunic instead of the YSL tunic. It’s a tragedy, really; I don’t know how she summons the courage to show herself in public.

The Times has recently been writing an awful lot about the middling problems of wealthy people (witness last week’s “I’m sad because my kitchen remodeling project is over!” story), and this is particularly troubling when the class divide is widening so noticeably in our country.

I wonder if Cathy Horyn and her friends know that for every person who can’t afford Balenciaga anymore, there are probably thousands who can’t even afford its “affordable” replacement of Peter Som (whose dresses are around $1,800). I just can’t feel sorry for anybody who complains about not being able to afford luxury goods while, uh, there’s a war going on. I know fashion in itself can be considered a frivolity, but this story exemplifies not only what’s wrong with fashion (the ridiculous price tags) but also what’s wrong with our materialistic-to-a-fault culture.

patrick robinson for target pictures

Nitrolicious has ’em, and from what I’m seeing, I’m not super-excited. The line looks breezy and appropriately summery, but… it looks like American Eagle Outfitters. The quality’s probably the same, but with these cheapy-cheap things, you’re paying for design. And this collaboration seems to be missing that latter part. >> Nitrolicious

marxist models of modeling

I’m going to forgive New York magazine’s lazy title tag (The Unbearable Thinness of Being a Model) because the story is a compelling read.

Writer Emily Nussbaum jumps into the skinny-model debate, and for much of the story, it’s more of the same (Natalia Vodianova’s panel speech, models dying, etc.). Her approach gets more compelling, though, when she touches on the class issues involved for many of the Eastern European models:

“And [the pressure to be thin] goes double for the new breed of models, many of whom come, like Vodianova, from the poorest regions of Eastern Europe. For these girls, pressures to stay thin may be a small price to pay for escaping the small towns they came from.”

The teenage girls who come from these poor areas have very few prospects back home. Without adequate education or job opportunities, let’s face it, modeling is their only potential way out of poverty.

Put yourself in the place of one of these girls. You are 15 years old and you have the opportunity to get yourself out of a sorry situation, travel the world and maybe send some money to help your family back home. So if losing ten pounds is the difference between you being booked or not getting a dime, what are you going to do? You’re probably going to do whatever it takes to stay employed.

Outside of the fashion business, people look at these emaciated girls and condemn them for encouraging eating disorders. And yes, there are many women and girls who look at Iekeliene Stange and think, “I need to look like her.” But what they don’t see is that within the industry, these girls aren’t trying to be thin so they can turn some Iowan farmgirl into an anorexic; they’re trying to be thin to keep getting work.

My debut with award-winning actress Michelle Williams

THE SETTING
Immediately after the 3.1 Phillip Lim show ends

THE PLAYERS
The Fashionist
The Fashionist’s photographer
Michelle Williams, pretty actress

—-
THE FASHIONIST: Hi, Michelle.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS: Oh, hi.
THE FASHIONIST: What did you think of the show?
MICHELLE WILLIAMS: I loved it. It was just so pretty.
THE FASHIONIST: I know. I want everything. I also wanted to say thanks for making Brokeback Mountain, because it really did a lot to help gay and straight people alike.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS: Oh, thank you!

(THE FASHIONIST’S PHOTOGRAPHER approaches)

THE FASHIONIST: Michelle, this is [T.F.P.]. [T.F.P.], this is Michelle.
THE FASHIONIST’S PHOTOGRAPHER: Hi, Michelle.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS: Hi.
THE FASHIONIST: We were just talking about Brokeback Mountain.
THE FASHIONIST’S PHOTOGRAPHER: Oh. (clearly not recognizing MW). That was a good movie.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS: (looks bummed that her role in this film is not recognized)

FIN!

Sienna Miller does not wear pants

…and yet, she was the toast of last night’s Rag and Bone show. Some celebrities will sneak in at the last minute, presumably because they:

A) do not care about punctuality
B) do not want to deal with dozens of people accosting them

Sienna, however, was in her front-row seat at least 20 minutes before the 6pm showtime, and as we all know, shows don’t start on time; so really, she was about 45 minutes early. So my guess is that homegirl either had major time to kill, or she wanted the attention of photographers. She got it, of course, but seeing it in action made me feel embarrassed for her.

The show? So-so. It had this newsboy-meets-Gangs of New York thing going on, which looked good but wasn’t terribly original. Whereas some other shows that day had wowed me with clever cuts and novel reference points, this one made me think, “Ah! Okay, they’re doing the masculine-tailoring thing.” Which isn’t a bad thing, but it’s also not the most exciting. For men, it didn’t come off as well. Leather jackets, wallet chains and tweed are not necessarily the best combination. “This looks like Eurotrash meets Oliver Twist,” my partner dryly commented. Touche!